Author Archives: Anica

Friday afternoon

Sweet afternoon with the babe. It was really nice to get off work in time to catch an evening walk while it was still light. I’ve been missing being more active and hope to do more of this.

It’s hard to believe after the stress of the last year and especially the last weeks that we could have such an easeful nice week – I just want to bask in this feeling!

The calls

Today is not an abnormal day for phone calls. Recently mom has been calling a little less but for the last year or maybe even longer some days she just calls and calls and calls.

Because of the nature of being a therapist I can’t answer while I’m working. So she just keeps calling. Today she mostly wanting to ask/tell me about the garbage since it’s garbage night. I had actually taken out the cans when I was last there so they’d be set for today, but even though the task was technically done, the anxiety remained.

The calls used to worry me when I would see I had missed so many, but I’ve come to experience that so far they are almost never urgent- despite the frequency.

Today mom told me she knows she shouldn’t just call repeatedly but that she worries I am not getting them, so she just keeps trying! Not pictured are the 5 additional calls I got via Facebook messenger!

The intro

It’s been an easier week in my life and I thought it might be a good time to start this project- a collection of musings from a particularly wild era for me. My daughter, Ella, is 16 months old, and my mom, Barbara, is 78 years old. I take care of them both and am a single mama after using a donor to conceive. I’m also a full time therapist, a friend, a hiker, a traveler.

I’ve been doing the sandwiched caregiver thing since Ella was born and caring for my mom increasingly since my dad died and especially since 2020 when I moved back home during the Covid Pandemic and in response to my mom being hospitalized for a possible medication issue (which also may have been a clearer sign something was going on with her memory).

My mom has Alzheimers. Currently in the moderate stages. She still lives alone but has had increasing difficulty with day to day tasks- cooking, cleaning, bills, etc. I’ve taken over and/or systemized most of these things, and she has risen to the occasion, but there is still a lot of support needed from me throughout the week.

They are both such loves. Ella is silly and loving and mischevious. Mom is empathetic and shy and sometimes a bit anxious. The two of them have a beautiful relationship and I am so glad we get to all be together in this time, even if sometimes it feels like way too much for me to handle.